Here’s my list of what I’m exploring this week.

What I’m Saying

I hate figs.

Why is this important for you to know? Because many of us with ADHD, me included at times, are people pleasers. We are afraid to express our needs. We gulp them down as we nod – smiling- at our hairdresser’s latest concoction sitting on our scalp, while crying inside…and give them a tip, to boot.

The waitress landed a plate of salad a few feet below my face. I stared at it. Because it contained a pretty assortment of black wrinkled figs that I asked her to leave out.

I do not like figs, as you well know, now, but I couldn’t tell her to please remove them. Instead, I smiled and thanked her.

Of course, I could easily take them off my plate, but there was no place to put them. Just looking at them made my stomach lurch.

WHY oh WHY do we stay silent? Why do we say no when someone who cares about us offers help when we need help at times? I have some ideas:

  1. After years of undiagnosed, untreated ADHD, we may carry into adulthood a sense of shame for – at least our perception- making life hard on those around us.
  2. We may have “messed up” at school, at work, in our relationships, raising our kids, and… fill in the blank. We don’t feel worthy; our self-esteem is in a mud pile waiting for us to sink into. We just cannot reach out and share our difficulties, ask for help, or request the figs be removed from our sight.

Are you ready to voice your needs? If not, it’s time to explore why, and working with a therapist might be the answer for you. Share some of your difficulties in saying “no” or asking for help in my Comment section below.

Spring Special! Personal ADHD Consultations with me on Zoom or Email: ½ off through March. Hurry- Spots fill up fast.

Tired of being stuck? Being late? Not being understood?

Let’s talk!

Our work will be action-focused to answer your questions and help you get on track with a specific doable plan. I have ADHD and a daughter with ADHD – I get it! I know your journey has not been easy, but we will work together to turn that around.

Don’t suffer in silence. Sign up for a consultation with me by going here. Or email me with your questions about how my consultations work, at terry@addconsults.com. Life is about to begin for you!

** Due to popular demand, I have opened up more slots for online consultations via Zoom. These have become super popular, so if you’re looking to work with me, grab an appointment (they fill up quickly). We meet live on Zoom (or you can request an email consultation instead).
Learn more and sign up here.

What are you Doing Tonight at 7:30pm EST?
(March 27, 2024)


REGISTER NOW– There’s no cost to you!

My Topic:

Have you been told all your life that you are too sensitive? Are you easily overwhelmed? Are you unable to watch violent or other intensely emotional TV shows? 

Do you feel sensory “assaulted” by your environment? Does this sound like you?

  • Lights are too bright
  • Clothing tags feel like daggers to your skin
  • Perfume triggers migraines
  • You can’t stand crowds, malls, noisy places
  • You feel things deeply, and take on others’ feelings as well
  • Do you see criticisms where there might not be any?

Join me! There’s no cost to attend! And it’s live. And you can ask me your questions on this topic! For men and women with ADHD, parents of ADHD kids, mental health professionals, educators, coaches, and anyone looking to better understand this important topic.

Don’t miss this live event, March 27, 2024 at 7:30pm EST!

Can’t make it live? No problem, a recording will be sent to all registrants the day following the webinar.


Questions? webinar@add.org

See you there!

What I Learned

Tim Ferriss, American entrepreneur, author, podcaster, and lifestyle guru, has a terrific podcast with great guests, great insights. I really enjoyed this episode from a few years back, on Finding the One Decision That Removes 100 Decisions.

What I Recommend

The Folding Book: A Complete Guide to Creating Space and Getting Organized
By Janelle Cohen

In The Folding Book, Janelle guides you through all the folds you could ever imagine and more—including the dreaded fitted sheet—with step-by-step photos and instructions and her helpful tips and tricks.

                                            Check it out HERE.

Where to find Terry Matlen:

Website: www.ADDconsults.com
Coaching:  www.QueensOfDistraction.com
TikTok: http://www.tiktok.com/@terrymatlen
LinkedIN: www.linkedin.com/in/terrymatlen/

Wait: Like this article? Please leave your thoughts, resources, hacks, etc. in the comment section below. 

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ADHD- friendly disclosure: Some of the links above earn me a tiny commission at Amazon and elsewhere. The end.