I hate formal events like weddings, Bar Mitzvahs, showers; anything that requires dressing up, small talk chatting, especially when I can’t hear what guests are saying, loud music, flashing dance lights, foods that take three days to digest, and chocolate-covered fruit at the dessert table. Oh, and nuts that have been mauled by all those fingers.
I also detest (and avoid) manicures, pedicures, and clothes shopping. I recoil at the thought of pre-ceremony events like out-of-towners parties, brunches, and special hair styling. Oh, and trying to find the perfect gift and then wrapping it? I am all thumbs when it comes to paper, scissors, and tape. That children’s game, Rock, Paper, Scissors was named for me and my total incompetence when it comes to gift wrapping.
I freak when people stop by unannounced, and I haven’t had a chance to hide my clutter or sweep up the avalanche of furballs and bunnies.
The Pandemic has removed all of these activities from my life this past year and I couldn’t be happier.
I was talking to a friend of mine via email about ADHD and how the pandemic has altered her life, as it has just about everyone’s. She admitted sheepishly that though she’s thrilled the vaccines are rolling out and hopefully allowing us to return to some sort of normalcy soon, she quite enjoyed a year of downtime.
And I agree. For me, anyway.
Of course, we are heartsick for those who lost their lives during this horrific year. There are no words to comfort those who lost loved ones or who were severely sickened by this awful virus.
On the other hand…
For many of us with ADHD, especially the introverted inattentive type, there’s been a sense of relief: no last-minute frenetic scurrying to get the house de-cluttered for guests.
No large gatherings where we might have to deal with boredom, shyness, maybe even outright anxiety at such events.
On the plus side of the pandemic are:
- Not having to worry about makeup (yay!).
- Getting away with not shampooing for days (Ok, let’s be honest: and other grooming routines).
- Being able to work from home in pajamas.
- Sleeping in late.
- A bare calendar.
- No massive holiday dinners to prepare or attend.
There are indulgences, too:
Take- out meals
Not worrying so much about the state of your home.
This isn’t to downplay the hardships many have endured- those of you who have lost income, or worse- your job. Losing your home, your car, your credit card. Or worrying about getting ill or losing someone to the virus. Or depression. Anxiety. Relying on alcohol for comfort. Loneliness. The list goes on.
A lot has been written about this. But I wanted to discuss the other side of the coin- the good news for those of us with ADHD, hypersensitivities, anxiety, and such… because not much is said about it. Why? I think it’s because people feel guilty about sharing the positives of hunkering down and taking a step back when the world seems to be in shambles.
We who crave our quiet time, have the opportunity to self-reflect. To express ourselves in creative ways. My friend, above, has been spending her days making art. I have, too, and recorded a song I wrote for my grandson.
Other people I know have deepened their relationships with loved ones, knowing how easy it is to lose people close to them. I’ve seen copious amounts of creativity being expressed.
The pace has slowed down for many, and though virtual schooling is extremely hard for moms with ADHD, many have reported a deepening in their relationship with their children.
What are some of the positives you’ve experienced this past year? Please share in the comment section below.
* Like this article? I write about all kinds of ADHD experiences here on my website in the blog section, and if they spark something in you, talk to me! I offer online consultations for men and women with ADHD.
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